Shame (Intern Insights)
“…I am 31 years old and I have struggled all my life. My heart is bad. I do things that I’m not proud of…I am a Christian and go to church, yet I do horrible things. I behave badly because of a particular childhood experience…”
Today I want to cover a topic that many of us would probably rather ignore or simply pretend doesn’t exist. Shame. A taboo word not often mentioned, because to utter it would end the denial about its presence in our lives. It’s a universal issue, and people everywhere feel shame about something. Some feel guilty over poor decisions they’ve made, while others may feel shameful about something that was done to them. This feeling can result from any number of life events that hit us with the force of an ocean wave and leave agonizing, emotional scars in its wake.
I’m not saying that the pains you’ve lived through don’t hurt, because I know from experience that they do. But so many times we make excuses, blaming current choices on someone or some incident that occurred in the past. Yes, more times than not a sorrowful childhood or traumatic event is the result of unfair treatment or abuse beyond one’s control. And I’m so sorry if that is you today. But unfortunately, many of us never move past these defining moments. We handle the negative emotions they carry by just projecting them on to something else, instead of dealing with the real issues in our heart. We turn to other temporary fixes that the world offers which all inevitably result in the isolating realities of guilt and shame, emotions not from God yet deeply rooted in the souls of millions.
In Project Hannah, we often talk about women being in physical, cultural, and emotional bondage at the hands of others. But what I think gets slightly neglected is this debilitating, self-induced captivity so many are trapped in. Countless individuals have let their shame lock them in a mental cell and throw away the key. If today you feel that burden, please know you’re not alone. And can I just tell you something? The Gospel is the good news of forgiveness and liberation! The Lord doesn’t look down on you in condemnation because of your stupid decisions. He gazes upon you with love. All of our sin and shame was atoned for when Jesus Christ died on the cross 2,000 years ago. In His final breaths He said, “It is finished.” He paid the ultimate sacrifice, and our identities can now rest in Him.
But what about those of you who are already Christians? Everything is supposed to be butterflies and rainbows once you choose to follow Jesus, right? Wrong! Read again the testimony above. Life is still life. We mess up, fall down, make terrible decisions and then face the shame and heaviness on our hearts because of those choices. It’s hard at times for believers to escape feeling like a hypocrite when we call ourselves followers of Christ, yet sin like we’ve never even met Him.
But you don’t have to live in mental bondage and pay for your transgressions again and again, day after day. You can walk in total freedom that is found in Christ! Please don’t mistake this, though, as permission to run off and do whatever you please because God will love and forgive you no matter what. He knows that because of our human nature we will fall and never be totally sinless or perfect like His Son, Jesus. But because of our love for Him, He does expect us to sin less as we strive to serve Him.
So my challenge is this: don’t be afraid to talk about shame. Bring it to the Lord; open up about what you’re going through with others whom you trust. Let there be healing in taking away shame’s power over you and walking in God’s freedom instead. I want to leave you today with the conclusion to the testimony that started this entry. See for yourself how this woman’s story ended…
“I really need Jesus, and I now want a renewed heart. The Women of Hope program encouraged me to be willing to change my lifestyle and live as a real child of God…”
Amen.
Be informed and inspired by reading Morgan's full Intern Insights series.